Sensitive question....

Salam,

What do you feel when someone ask you about your sexual activity?? In medicine, it is relevent to ask this question to the patient when necessary regarding to the problem.Definitely,we will keep it private and confidential. Today is the end of my 5th week and so far I had some 'shocking information' from two different patient.

I bet you it is not easy to ask those question in respect to the patients' feeling. It is a bonus when the patient really confess to you which means they do really trust you.We in the medical field cannot banned or stigmatize certain group of people(even though we don't agree with their conduct) by treating them differently.It is the rule of ehtics to be beneficience,non-maleficience, justice and autonomy in giving our service.

So, what are the shocking news??

PATIENT 1, an old indian man. he confess having multiple sexual partner since 20 years old.Most of the reason is due to influnces from friends.He admitted that he have high sexual drive. It happend since his early twenties.He said that its common with his Malay MUSLIM friends. He even saw some of them have sex with dogs(tak masuk dek akal btol manusia ni).
He spend some of his money to support the 'prostitution bussiness'.Up till now his family especially his wife doesn't know about his extra activity. He was admitted to the ward because of difficulty in urination due to benign prostatic hyperplasia(BPH).BPH is enlargement of the prostate that constrict the urinary tract causing a person to have slow flow,increase frequency in urination etc.It is common in middle aged men..

PATIENT 2, a 27 years old Malay Muslim man who is practicing anal sex.FYI, he is well educated man with a degree. He admitted to still have feelings on women but not in any relationship with them.He agrees with the idea of marriage and have have kids if he find the women he likes. The activity is painful but according to him,is not painful to do it if he likes the man.He do it at least once a week since the past 3 years.He started with oral sex and then advancing to anal sex due to influences from friends...

out of curosity,i asked him a few questions and here are the summary...
1. each week will be a different partner
2. they meet through their special website
3. some of them are married man with kids
4. it happen to all kind of people: students, teachers and even doctors..
5. muslim men also involve with this...
6. usually they are man with soft personality(usually they will be the receiver)
7. normal looking man also do it(usually they are the giver

He was admitted to the ward due to problem with the fistula of anus(the anal canal is communicating with the skin surface).It happen mainly due to hygienity problem. The predisposing factor in this man is his sexual practice that can cause infection to happen easily on the anus.

Regarding practising anal sex with strangers...he have high chance to get other uncurable infections like HIV and hepatitis B or C. I pray that he will stop the conduct and try to appreciates his live more in a better way. I can only give my advice but the decision is in his hands to change.

My own tought......
I don't know why people still do things eventhough they know it will harm themselves.If they believe in god, don't they think about afterlife(hari akhirat). Don't they care about the sins they've done?? (tekejut juga ramai MELAYU ISLAM yg terjebak)

Maybe the pleasure they have right now win over their guilt of sins..

If you have the will to change, anything is possible.
Wasalam(",)

P/s: tau pasal ni, takut pula nak kawin..huhu.kpd bakal2 isteri diluar sana check background bakal suami anda.kepada lelaki, kami perempuan ada tak payah cari lelaki lain..hehe

I feel small.......

Salam..

For Surgical posting, I was assigned to vascular team and all the registrar are taller than average Malaysian man. So, imagined what happened to me during the ward round(visit patients bed).I have to find any posible potential space to fit my 5 feet tall self in able to have a good view and be apart of the team.Sometimes i just stand behind them and see the patient through any spaces exist between them.

However the title above isn't about size issue.It is a methaphore of what i feel since this pass few weeks.

I feel small as i feel my knowledge wise is still not enough. The discussions i have with my study group mates and team members does really helps me. Questions bombarded to us during ward rounds or teaching from our supervisors, registrar, Medical Officer or any seniors do give us clue in what should we know. Well, they are a lot.Sometimes I know the answer but the way I convey it is wrong. I hope I can master the skill of answering 'maturely' according to what they want.

I feel small as I am hopeless to see and hear people crying of pain. There is nothing I can do except doing anything I can to relief it.During certain painful procedure what i can do is only provide some supportive words and pat their hand or back. To be in this profession we can give our emphaty but not total symphaty. If you are emotionally liable to them you cannot perform your duty towards them well.

I feel small as I never think I can do everything alone. As a medical student, I do rely on my friends to relieve my studies burden.Knowledge are for sharing, it is not for keeping. We learn and remember more through discussion rather than reading alone.

I feel small as Allah's humble servant as anyone can get sick. Sometimes death comes within a short notice and you don't realise it until its too late. A patient that i clerk(interviewing his problem) and do a bit of examination on last tuesday was only 27 years old. He was detected to have liver cancer stage 4 within a month. What puzzled the doctors was he doesn't have risk factors to have it and the cause was idiopathic(unknown).He passed away on wednesday(the day after I clerk him).May he rest in peace...AMIn.

I praised the mother to be very supportive and never leave his bedside to be with him.The father is a responsible man to take care of their other 3 daughters at home in Malacca.The neighbours back home are caring enough to hold Yassin recital and Hajat Prayers for him. She told me about her sons' problem without any single tears in her eye. I guess she accepts her son's fate as Qada' and Qadar from Allah. I am sure the there are reasons for all the things happening to us (good or bad).The way of how you accept things will determine what will happen next.Being always humble to him(Allah) does make you always put Allah first in your heart. Hope I can maintain that.

Moreover,doctors are not superhuman, they can get sick too.Patient comes to you to get better regardless you are sick or not.

Today, alhamdulillah I manage to do venopuncture(taking blood from vein) from a patient at Internal medicine ward for my logbook.I've already practice this procedure with my friends a few times and as the consequence, we get bruises at the site of needle puncture on our arm.Well, no pain no gain.hehe.. We willingly to injured ourselves in order to be competent in doing the invasive procedure to the patient.

Wasalam (",)

P/s can't wait for the weekend to have a nice jog by the Taman Tasik Permaisuri...and i'm Not going home.Have case write up to be done!!

Time is EMAS..

Salam,

Demi masa sesungghuhnya manusia kerugian,melainkan mereka yang beramal beriman dan beramal soleh...I have to agree with this verses from Al-Quran taken from al-Asr(Time).I would like to apply this verses to show how precious time is(not in a religous angle). We never realise it till we get really busy or into trouble.

I realise now that only those who have passion on medicine can survive the life long learning years.Encouragement from parents or intrest alone can't isn't enough to satisfy the needs you have to satisfied in order to be a DOCTOR!

Why??
1. STUDY always is the top most priority(after Allah the CreatoR)..i get this habit of reading anytime i can as I always feels that my knowledge is still shallow.

yup, we need to cover a lot of things..

2. Time is EMAS(gold)...everytime is valueble and you have to learn to put 1st thing 1st. Thus, time management is very important. I have to sacrifice my sleeping time..huhu

3. Have to always think POSITIVE and raise up from any failure with dignity and a promise to work harder (This is what i get from stories for those who fail and have to re-sit exam or even repeat their year without giving up).Though, i never plan on repeating year, may Allah forbid that from happening

4. Understanding from people you have comitment for is very important. Alhamdullh i don't have comitments to anyone except my my family so far. Lucky i trained myself to only call my mum once a week or only for important things since i left home to further studies at Indonesia. I always told them my life now is not as easy as before,I hope they understand me..

Regardless all I mentioned above doesn't draw me back so far....because

Alhamdulillah,I have passion on becoming a doctor...

Since i get bored of only watching and clerking,today I assisted the nusres at procedure room of surgical clinic doing wound dressing, removing the suture and changing the suprapubic catheter.

I feel happy doing those thing regardless the smell and view that might cause people have nausea or loss of appetite..This is because i learned a lot(knowing the way of handling equipments) when i do it rather than watching.I'm glad Kak Fiza & Kak Dijah let me assist them..

For me to be good in something you must know everything from the basic till the complicated one. Its a good thing also to learn about the hospital policy and the fee the patients need to pay(saja ngada nak tau lebih2 la pula...",)

Today also i met the patient i clerk during first week of posting. I help up cleaned his wound and glad to meet that uncle again.His wound looks ok and I'm happy with it.

Good communication skill also the key point in becoming a good doctor. I have to get patient's trust and intrest during taking their history of disease. I was told by a Medical officer, to be a good student, you have to clerk at least one patient a day and do general basic physical examintaion on him/her.Since then i try to apply that.

As a clinical student, i have to be creative in finding the opportuninty to learn wisely. Like what i can conclude from Prof Hanafiah(my group spervisor) advice, there's nobody will tell you what to do. You have to find it yourself the opportunity to learn and not wait someone to come and teach you.

I had a valuable lesson earlier this week of not preparing much and not revising well on my basic knowledge.I hope to not repeat the same mistake again an always alert on that. Hope i can perform better.

May Allah make my journey in life smoother and easier..AMIN!!

Wasalam..

Ps: I still think that life is wonderful and meaningful in its own way each day..hehe(",).

2nd week.

Salam,

First of all Allhamdulillah(thank u God) for given me the chance to live till now and celebrate my 21st birthday today(June,6th).Key of freedom they say..I think its key to responsibility to make the right decisions in life!!

Second week just ended today.I and my housemate take the half day off,go to KLCC and watched gorgeous Zac Efron in '17 again'.For me, i feel kind of weird to exposed around people after only go back & fro to hospital for the rest of my days. The white coat really have an effect in changing my personality,psychologically in a positive way. With the white coat on I am ready to mingled with patient, seeing dreadfull wounds...Without it I'm just Me someone's daughter, friend and sister.

After a few times reschedule,changing groups we finally settled with our original group during 1st week. I'm very glad with that decision as i really LIKE my group. I am very thankfull to have a nice group members that are dedicated to our group and the most important thing is cooperative and willing to share. Sharing is caring right??

As a group leader, i make sure everyone gets the opportunity to fill up their log books,arrange teaching meet with our busy supervisors and our schedule.Extra thing we do is we set up our own tutorial meet at the end of certain procedure or OT and discuss what we have learned and what we should read more.Thus, i makes the learning process much more benificial to everyone in the group.

This week also,my study group just started our meetings and I learn a lot from it!It consist of 5 members (3girls,2guys).I think everyone should have study group once you enter clinical.

AFter 2nd week, i can see a few ADVANTAGES that i have as coming from UKM-UNPAD twinning programme:
* Our SKills lab really exposed us too the clinical. Here, i had a workshop yesterday and learned 6 skills. Each skills was taught for 10minutes in rotation of seven groups of 10 students. The skills that we learned were:
1. Urine catheterization
2. Pre Rectal examinationa(aka Digital rectal exmntn)
3. Suturing and holding the equipments
4. Nasogastric tube insertion
5. Breast examination
6. Brannula insertion(aka IV insertion)
Imagine how lucky I was to learn one skill for 2 and half hour€s in a group of 10 in a week and get evaluated in the second meet in the same week at UNPAD. Everyone get the chance to memorize,learn and use all the equipments adequately.However, as people have variability, the skills are slightly different but allahamdulillah I can adapt to that.

* We learned more cases.Logically we learned more as the regular students learned pre-clinical for 2 years and ours are 3 years.However, i still have to re-read as i forget some of it..hehe

* Since we know certain things more, we become quite confident to do things.yeke??(kembang kuncup kembang kuncup)hehe..Maybe some of us do...A radiologist told my friend that he heard that UNPAD students are confident.It must be from talks among his colleages since our postings doesn't majorly involved radiology yet.

I'm glad that so far my friends from UNPAD manage to be OK in here. So far i didn't here any negative comments on us..I hoping to not hearing about it at all i the future.

Wednesday was my lucky day as I get to do all the things i planned on that day.What are they?
1. Clearking a very cooperative patient in the surgical clinic.

2. Presenting a case in front of a registrar(doctor that is going to be a speacialist).He corrected me and i'm glad that i learned my weaknesses at last in presenting case.Will try to present case again next time.

3. Watched an operation on removing the gallbladder(cholestectomy)by Open surgery method on a cholelithiasis patient whom i clerk a day before for my case assessment report.After it was removed, a registrar disect it and i get to feel the content(bile stones-moxed type)while collecting it into the specimen bottle. I get to feel a real gallbladder too.It was a WONDERFULL experience after standing for about two hours straight..The patient also a nice lady.She was very helpfull during the clerking me & my friend conduct befor the operation.She also let us practise some general physical examination on her.

So,those are some view of my posting this week..My inquisitive and motivation level is still high.Hopefully it will go on forever..(",)Till then, bubye.

Wasalam.

P/S: i got a sister in my family at last...a sister IN LAW (",). May happiness will always be with you Abang Yayai and Kak Yah.Can't wait for a nephew or niece and becoming and aunty..

1st week of 1st posting

Salam (peace)

So, I'm sure some of you are excited to know what happened to me during my first week of my clinical year.My first posting is SURGERY! So..here it goes:

In summary:

1. The first week always be the blurry one..The method of learning is TOTALLY DIFFERENT from pre-clinical years..NOBODY is there to tell you what to do. Everything comes from your own initiative and intelligence to find the opportunity. You won't know it till you experience it.

2. Regardless all from the above...I ENJOYED my condition right now in the CLINICAL way..so far...WHY??
* You get to see things that you can't get from books
* You apply and refresh what you learn during pre-clinical into 'real thing'
* We get exposure to real patient...real cases..COOL!!
* We get to know the hospital: how it really works with a lot of people working togather to help those in need
* You get to sharpened your communication skill by doing CLERKING( aka amnenesis)..this job is our main job in the ward..investigating the patients..
Sometiomes, i feel like i'm a police officer..hoho

3. I understand now why people says SURGERY is the 'inspirational posting'
* the doctors mostly are COOL...(get to see some Good looking faces to..hehe)
* watching surgery is a WONDERFULL experience
* less tense in this department
* the Operation theatre(OT) is fully air-cond...have to wear scrubs when entering the OT department.so..adala feel mcm surgeon

4. About the posting..there are 3 places you have to go:
* WARD : there are 2 ward 3rd year students are allowed to go to..ward 1 (men) and ward 2(women)
* CLINICS : here, you can learn a lot here..get to participate more in the procesdures
* OPERATION THEATER (OT): You can-see-only learning process but you should apply what you see with what you learn to make the process more benificial.

5. WOn't I get lost??
* Every students get a log book.This log book is fill with requirements that students have to fullfill during each posting and everything must be confirmed with the doctor or nurse signature.
* The seniors are kind and toughtful to organize the buddy system. Each junior have their own buddy(senior) to help out in surviving the clinical life.So, we can ask them about studies, books etc.

So, in conclusion...
to my UNPAD juniors..no need to worry..be motivated to looking forward to your clinical years at PPUKM.
To my self..i'm thinking of becoming a surgeon..hopefully i can succeed in everything I do and always feel motivated to learn.

MOTIVATION thats' DRIVE you to go FAR BEYOND THE SEAS..

Wasalam(peace be upon u who read this)

PPD camp

Salam...

After white coat ceremony at the end of PPD Camp 2...

I just got back from Besut BTN camp after spending 5 days there for Professional Personal Development 2 (PPD)camp.Medical students of UKM have to attend this camp during 1st(starting pre-clinical),3rd(starting clinical) and 5th year(final year).

PPD is a modul that will be assessed throughout the year and this camp is the beginning of the modul. This modul is intergrated into each posting.However, I'm not really sure yet how they evaluate us yet.If you fail PPD it equal to failing a posting.If you fail 3 or more posting after re-sit, you have to repeat the year..huhu..May Allah forbid that happening to me..

The moduls are mainly by Assoc. Prof Dr Harlina with the help of other PPD department members.This time the Camp comandent is Assoc. Prof Dr Zulkifli who is also our Pengetua KTDI

The objective of PPD camp are different for each year.For PPD 2 it is more to developing medical professionalism and preparing us to the clinical world.The moduls are related to managing diversity, honesty, assesscibality as a medical students and medical ethics. We are also given a lecture by Prof. Dr Rohaizak about etiquettes of doctors on our behavior,manner and appearence.



I am glad to have such a GREAT team members regardless our diversity..hehe.We all share the same spirit and had a good bonding during the activities. I am in Kumpulan 10 and there was 24 groups for 272 students.Quite a big number eh??

In summary:

1.The camp is at Besut, 5minutes walk to the beach.


2.My bus sesat during our journey to Besut and we arrived after 12 hours on road..huhu
Excited faces when we just started our journey



3.The condition was VERY HOT!!I nearly melted...hoho..

4.WE are well fed as we get to eat 6 times per day(ruining my diet plan..huhu)


5.I LIKE my Kumpulan 10 members...they are wonderful



6.I get rashes and gatal2 on 4th day till now..huhu.Some of my friends get similar problems.

7.The Kembara(which is the cream of PPD) had to be cancelled due to the heavy rain but, good thing is we get to mandi hujan..hehe
after the Kembara was cancelled..we heal our dissapointment by taking photos by the beach..

8.On 4th day, we get to do Subuh prayer by the beach however the sunrise wasn't visible due to cloudy condtion(later it rained and we have to cancel Kembara..huhu)

9.The schedule are very thight...slept during ceramah BTN..can't help it..(",)

10.We have to write a letter to ourselves about what we want to achieve during clinical years and our feeling at the moment.These letters are kept and will be given to us on the day before our graduation in 2012 insyaAllah.I just can't wait to read my letter again on 2012.
with Dr Irwan Januarsih & Dr Uni who are from UNPAD..we will miss you!!

I would like to thank all who make this PPD camp2 happen especially to Dr Harlina & PPD unit, Dr. Zul, Dr SHahrir, Dr Setiawan & Dr Irwan Januarsih from UNPAD and all fascilitators.Special thanks to my fascilitator Dr Azaman(Pharmacology) and Dr Suzaily(Psychiatry).Both of you have been a wonderful fascilitator to us, Kumpulan 10.

I really enjoyed this PPD camp.I hope to experience more excitement and enjoyful moments during PPD3 camp during my 5th year..With this I rest my case

Wasalam(",)

I'm Home

Salam..

Alhamdulillah..I'm already home for two days. It's steamy here..I keep changing my clothes because I always drain in my sweat.Thank you to the GLOBAL WARMING, my home is getting warmer compare to 3 years ago.

What happen in this 2 days:
1. I become a 'puteri lilin' and keep on staying at home with the fan or air-cond on.So friends if you want to ask me out bring me to a close area with air-cond or fan..hehe.

2. My family is busy with my brother's wedding preparation(about a month away). Thank you Abg yayai, I become your 'buruh kerahan tenaga' managing the bunga telur and wedding invitation cards.My mum decided to make the 'hantaran' and 'bunga telur' by herself with the help of other creative family members. Well, it can cut the cost and you' ll feel more satisfied with the end product if you make everything by yourself. Moreover, my family members are creative with these 'wedding thing'..hehe..Definitely will get their help when it comes to my turn.

3. Another tradition is we usually send the invitation card by hand..Yes, I repeat BY HAND!!...but only to certain people like family and close friend.SO, today they will go out and send the cards whlie visiting people they invite, while I have to stay home managing the other cards to be post and babysit my little brother(which i'm glad to stay in the air-cond home)...(",)

4. My family is also in transition of moving to Malacca(but we still keep the house at KL).The house is still in renovation, so still can't move in yet.

5. My 7 boxes of cargo shipping also arrived safely in the evening on the day i arrived.. Still thinking how to manage all the boxes...huhu.

6. Like to tease my little brother in my free time and swim almost everyday(",)

7. Pasar malam...yeah.And delicious Malaysian food..I'm in food HEAVEN.

8. Busy with preparation on registration at UKM on 13/5...have to pack my stuf from the 7 boxes and try to find some clothes from the boxes for my orientation and 5days camp..hoho

That's all for now.Sorry for babbling too much..Just bear with me (",)

Wasalam

p/s: pictures will be uploaded later.I'm borrowing my bro laptop for this..hehe